Sexuality Professionals Series: An Interview with Haley Hasen

Embrace Sexual Wellness is conducting a multipart spotlight series of interviews with sexuality professionals. If you missed the previous installments, check them out on our blog. For the final installment in our interviews, we spoke to Haley Hasen, educator and erotic laborer (Haley/Haley’s).

Haley Hasen is the founder of Haleyhasenuncensored, LLC. Haley is an artist, sex educator, certified crisis interventionist, erotic laborer, and sex toy enthusiast. Haley is involved with a federal work-study with RAINN, and is an art therapy intern at the nonprofit Clean and Sober Street based in DC. Haley is studying to receive a Master’s Degree in Art Therapy at George Washington University through a trauma-informed lens. 

Erotic labor refers to any kind of sex work. This could be stripping, full service sex work, selling erotic photographs and videos, or any other kind of work that involves sex or eroticism in some capacity. The word “prostitution” is an outdated and generally disparaging term which should be avoided unless someone explicitly identifies themself as such. Erotic labor is highly stigmatized which can make these careers risky because of the lack of safeguards and regulation. At the end of the day, everyone under capitalism has to sell some part of themselves and erotic laborers are no different. Erotic labor is an entirely legitimate and valid career that does not deserve the flack it receives.

What inspired you to pursue your career path? 
I feel I came about this career path while working on healing and unlearning my sexual trauma. I really appreciate Carl Jung's idea of being a "wounded healer." I hope to create a safer space for individuals to be able to process, heal and unlearn aspects of themselves. I decided to do erotic labor as a way to reclaim my autonomy and sensuality after my sexual trauma. I wanted to have full control over that identity and I feel empowered by this aspect.   

How does your field differ from that of other sexuality professionals?
My field is different due to what I choose to disclose, educate, and advocate for. I am working within the here and now framework. I am also transparent in certain spaces about my identity as an erotic laborer; however, in most spaces I keep this identity hidden due to societal views and protection of myself. I feel I overlap in all aspects of myself and I try to formulate a truer self with one identity instead of being a multi-hat person. 

What is the most rewarding part of your career?
Empowering and creating a safer and healing space for sex workers and individuals who have and are experiencing sexual trauma. I enjoy learning from others and how they present themselves in these spaces. 

What's the most misunderstood thing about what you do?
I am not always turned on and I do not only think about sex. Furthermore, while I have gone through trauma that is not the reason I entered this space. I entered it to empower and reclaim aspects of me that were taken away without my consent. 

What's the most common question you receive from others about your career?
”Can you teach me how to have sex?” is usually peoples’ go-to question on various dating apps and it always makes me roll my eyes. 

What advice would you want to share with aspiring sexuality professionals?
You cannot educate everyone! I learned this from a dear colleague, Lindsay Wynn. 

If you had to describe your work in one sentence, what would you say?
Relevant.

Is there anything you’d like to add? 
Pay, support and uplift Black and Brown Trans Sex Workers; they are the foundation of the sexuality field and are rarely credited. 

Thank you to Haley for sharing their knowledge and expertise with us! We encourage you to visit Haley’s social media and websites, linked below. 

• Instagram: @haleyhasenuncensored

• Website: haleyhasen.com

Sexuality Professionals Series: An Interview with Erica Smith

Embrace Sexual Wellness is conducting a multipart spotlight series of interviews with sexuality professionals. If you missed the previous ones, check them out on our blog. For the fourth installment in our interviews, we spoke with Erica Smith (she/her) of Erica Smith Education and Consulting.

Erica Smith spent 17 years working as a sex educator, advocate, and HIV prevention counselor for justice involved youth in Philadelphia, specifically young women and LGBTQ+ youth. Now she offers sexuality education that is tailored specifically to people raised in Purity Culture. Her clients were raised in incredibly restrictive and conservative religious environments that pathologize normal and healthy sexual behavior. Two years ago she started the Purity Culture Dropout Program, where she gives folks all of the medically accurate, queer inclusive, trauma informed, and shame free sex ed that they were denied.

Sex education is a profession that has a wide variety of forms. Some work in a more formal capacity like a school or non-profit, others work freelance. Some choose to become certified, others do not. Some utilize digital media as their main platform, some do mostly in-person work. Some work with youth, others work with adults. Most sex educators have a niche, a few topic areas that they specialize in. For Erica, her focus is battling purity culture. 

What inspired you to pursue your career path? 
I majored in Women's Studies in college and especially loved the classes on women's health and sexuality. I was very active in feminist politics in school, and my friends and I put on a few sexuality related events that drew a lot of controversy (this was the late 90s at Penn State). I loved doing these events and talking and learning about sexuality. There's nothing else I've ever wanted to do, honestly. 

How does your field differ from that of other sexuality professionals?
As far as I know, I'm the only sex educator who focuses specifically on people raised in purity culture; at least this is what I've been told by many prominent ex-Evangelical mental health professionals who also do purity culture work! 

What is the most rewarding part of your career?
The most rewarding part of my career is witnessing people's lives be truly transformed by the power of sexuality education. Sex education is transformative. It's a social justice issue. Good sex education is power. 

What's the most misunderstood thing about what you do?
That it's all… sexy. That I'm just teaching people the best oral sex techniques and talking about the mechanical aspects of sexual intercourse all day. I am happy to do that stuff and it absolutely comes up, but I'm doing so much more work around things like sexual values, shame, cultural messaging, gender roles and expectations, and things that are quite far from sexually arousing to be honest! Sexuality is such a large topic that touches on so many different aspects of our lives, and the actual act of sex is a rather small part of it.  

What's the most common question you receive from others about your career?
People most often ask how I got started in this field or why I focus on purity culture when I wasn't raised in it.

What advice would you want to share with aspiring sexuality professionals?
That we need more sex educators and that there isn't only one path to becoming one! We need sex educators with a whole variety of experiences and backgrounds and identities.

If you had to describe your work in one sentence, what would you say?
I help people understand themselves and their place in the world better through educating them about sexuality. 

Is there anything you’d like to add? 
Yes! I find social media's role in sex education to be so fascinating. It's a gift. There is great sex ed being put out there by so many people and organizations. This access changes peoples’ lives. 

Thank you to Erica for taking the time to share her perspective. We encourage you to find Erica on social media and her websites, linked below.

Instagram: @ericasmith.sex.ed
Website: purityculturedropout.com

Sexuality Professionals Series: An Interview with Casey Tanner

Embrace Sexual Wellness is conducting a multipart spotlight series of interviews with sexuality professionals. If you missed the previous ones, check them out on our blog. For the third installment in our interviews, we spoke with Casey Tanner (she/they), owner of The Expansive Group.

Casey Tanner is an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist who combines evidence-based research, queer affirming care, and pleasure activism to cultivate powerful relationships. Specializing in gender and sexual diversity, she partners with individuals, relationships, and institutions to expand limited mindsets, foster courageous behavior, and empower meaningful change around gender and sexuality.  After several individuals, couples and businesses sought out Casey’s guidance in making cultural shifts around gender and sexuality, they started The Expansive Group to better meet the growing demand.

Sex therapy is a type of psychotherapy focused specifically on sexual health, function, intimacy issues, and feelings, among other topics. While all sex therapists are formally trained, many but not all are officially AASECT-certified professionals. Typically, though not always, sex therapy is temporary, to address certain issues. Through sex therapy, you can learn to express your concerns clearly, better understand your own sexual needs and better understand your partner's sexual needs.

What inspired you to pursue your career path? 
The life-changing experience of talking about sex and queerness with my own therapist.  This space wasn't available to me until my early 20s and, for so many, is never available.  I wanted to become the space that I needed growing up - everything I do is, in some ways, a love letter to my younger queer self.

How does your field differ from that of other sexuality professionals?
My field (the intersection of therapist, educator, influencer, and consultant) is brand new!  While it's based on best-practices and evidence-based research from each of those individual fields, the combination feels like a new story that I'm writing every day.  There's no (updated) guidebook on how to balance the confidentiality ethics of being a therapist with the nuance of being an educator/influencer.  One of the more unique parts of my job is working with companies who want to do a better job around gender neutral language - I think of it as a sort of large-scale therapy for businesses!

What is the most rewarding part of your career?
Receiving feedback from my audience, students, or team that the space I'm creating means something to them. I get a lot of feedback that folks haven't seen anything like this before, and that really validates the "why" behind the work.

What's the most misunderstood thing about what you do?
That being a gender/sexuality professional means I have my own relationships and identity figured out. Surprise - I don't!

What's the most common question you receive from others about your career?
People often ask me what "queer sex" is. I usually respond with, "queer sex is intimacy that expands beyond the binary - it challenges our ideas on what is or isn't sex, what is or isn't normal, what is or isn't allowed."

What advice would you want to share with aspiring sexuality professionals?
To the extent possible, choose supervisors with a sexuality/queer background. I think direct supervisors are more important than the workplace itself, so don't silo yourself into only working in sexuality-focused practices. If you're able, do an administrative internship with a therapist or educator before graduate school so that you have a great letter of recommendation when it comes time for practicum applications.

If you had to describe your work in one sentence, what would you say?
I expand folks' ideas of what healthy sexuality looks like to include more diversity and more pleasure.

Thank you to Casey for taking the time to share their perspective. We encourage you to find Casey on social media and her websites, linked below.

• Instagram: @queersextherapy

• Website: theexpansivegroup.com