Is love blind? The creators of a new heterosexual reality dating show wanted to find out just that. *CW: Spoilers ahead.
In the Netflix show Love is Blind the contestants were separated by their gender and would attend “dates” with each other in separate rooms only being able to hear each other. The premise is designed to see if individuals could fall in love without ever laying eyes on each other... and to see if the love could last. I had reservations before watching the show, although I went in with an open mind and tried to be unbiased. The creators of the show have said they were surprised by how many couples emerged engaged (six in total). After becoming engaged, contestants then spent 30 days in Mexico before attempting to get married. I won’t spoil the ending for you but here is what I took away from the show:
1. I love the idea. It is like The Voice, but for dating. Taking away the value of physical beauty of individuals can have a dramatic effect. How important is physical attraction in romantic relationships anyway? After all, most culturally driven aspects of physical beauty change and fades throughout our lives. Physically beauty can also be seen differently due to someone’s personality. Oftentimes someone who is considered attractive can seem less appealing if they are selfish or mean spirited to others.
2. All of the individuals who participated in the show appear to be universally attractive. They may not be attractive to everyone, but they are all above average as far as beauty standards go. This leads me to wonder what would have happened if the show included participants of varying degrees of attractiveness within the US and cross-culturally.
3. It is still a reality show in which the circumstances are extraordinary. It’s easy to fall in love when you are isolated in a glorious location with no daily stressors. Many couples experience dissatisfaction with their partners because of the ways in which daily stressors affect us and how we react to them. While isolated and unable to see each other, couples had no stressors in this show. They were essentially living in a hotel and only required to “socialize” daily. No cleaning, running errands, work, bills, family, etc. Once couples were engaged, the show adds the stressor of planning a wedding, however, still in a beautiful location and without daily ongoing stress and exhaustion.
4. There are also no other outside factors demanding their time and attention. Some couples find it hard to share each other with the outside world. Friends, family, work, colleagues all play a role in our lives. This can create difficult dynamics in relationships. Without these external components, a false sense of intimacy can be present. Once these other relationships are introduced, it can be difficult to maintain the same intensity of intimacy in a romantic relationship.
I would encourage viewers to remember while these dating shows may be fun to watch, they should not be held as a representation of what dating looks like for most people. These are everyday people “falling in love” in extraordinary circumstances.
Did you watch the show? Do you think love is blind? Comment below and let us know what you think!
